not that I do

they don’t know you

not that I do

and not that they think

they do, but they don’t

and this is as good

or as close as they will get

and sure it’s a little bit sad, but

what did they expect?

a prize for knowing the most

they think they know

what you like or how you’ll react

again they are wrong in thinking

they are all right

listen close because this is no abbreviated version

first and last word is all they hear

because they have heard it all before

they have no patience for your story telling techniques

you are a waste of their time

to try to figure out because

as soon as they think they know

what you are about

you change and change is usually disregarded

I stop and pick it all up

a separate place for each change

the level of tolerance for your

strangeness

is next to nothing, if that…

not that I do

have the answers or anything

I do have a busy schedule

I watch as they scribble in their little notebooks

using crayons or markers to draw a picture or two

of someone they would like you to be

better if you were someone else

they won’t return your mail or want to sit and chat

over coffee or whatever

they need something else

to distract their busy minds

if they think do they think about you

when you aren’t around the corner waiting for them to call or come by

the way you might die

the whole process will go unnoticed

don’t you ever think about things in this way

you can’t tell me that you don’t talk to yourself

at least a couple times a day

they do 

they won’t admit it so don’t even try to get a straight answer from you know,

you know but no you don’t know

what that means—not that I do…