TodayIsTheDay #4

after holidaze spin
back to work
on the produce
one thing I do is produce
another holiday coming
right up
today is the day
planned out the new years
displays strive to do
the best I can
in the time given
not a bad job to have
since I have to work
to pay the bills
not enough eyes read
the thoughts
to make it the full time
only wish left
is to make it the full time
when working
today is the the day
got to get through it
even if I have to sneak
out an hour early
got hours saved up
for a day like today
slush and snow and
ice wind rain
finish up the year
cold out on the front porch
everyone's on the move...

WriteOn #2

in the sun trying to keep
my back to the wind
wooden chair someone built
arms perfect to write on
little smoke rising from the left
and the right keeps moving
catching the sun with the
metallic reflection
the sun is so warm
but the air around reminds
which season it really is
the perfect chair
for someone who writes
most comfortably
in the warmth of the sun...

TodayIsTheDay #3

today is the day
try to force myself
to think about tomorrow
old thoughts I might
borrow and put them
back when I am done
but what if it's unending
or on some future event
depending today has got
to be to the day to decide
to push on beyond what side
you thought you were on
because the division is gone
when you are all alone
no one to blame just you
we all come to that moment
solitary refinement exploring
all the possibilities none
of which seemed possible
forty years before today
great big pile of yesterdays
everyone of them waiting for tomorrow
endless tomorrows immortalized
with captured thoughts here free
to be whatever is interpreted
today is the day I sit
and watch the clouds lighten...

TodayIsTheDay #2

today is the day
not prepared to write
an essay but do have
something more to say
only two responses
he is crazy or the thought won't go
away you too will use
what you know to try
to figure out why none
of it makes sense anymore
or like I said
he is crazy is that other option
block the thought from
happening or taking hold
maybe the measurements
are wrong that has to be the case
today is the day I ask
how it is possible
given what we all know
because it is what has been taught
to be known as truth
today is the day
I look for an explanation...

titles included

three books
simultaneously
two came titles included
but no content
guess that's up to me
and as far as anyone
knows everything
is written the same
how many writers
still craft it by hand
how many just let
technology handle it
finishing words
sometimes didn't intend
to write so goes it
it's what they say it is
until you show them
what it really is
it's up to you
don't ever forget
to get lost thinking
while staring at the stars
might not be raining
anymore but it makes
no difference
to this one who gets
lost in thought
when staring at the stars...

TodayIsTheDay #1

today is the day
probably thought of it
yesterday might
remember it tomorrow
hard to forget today
is the day I got up before
three this morning
in the dark drove to work
couldn't imagine counting
how many thoughts
before car got warm
and moved an inch
not the usual rise and roll time
as it once was for many years
only interrupted by days off
in between where I put down
all my thoughts in the middle
like sandwiches to feed my soul
somehow and don't read anymore
if you think I can or will explain it
I can only present my perception
and today is the day
it was not grim despite the state
of the world willingly ignored
at times not ignorant to vigilance
necessary to regain balance
important in walking any walk
no matter how long it might be
or short just to get the blood
flowing mother on the road closest
to home pushing grand
daughter with a smile
beautiful to witness...

WriteOn #1

everyone gives the gifts
I can contribute to
empty books to fill
with my thoughts
everyone knows
what to give me
when gifts given
keeps me digging through
regular life to find
some of that inspiration
hidden in all the narrow
cracks and deep valleys
the highest mountains
visited remember
the presidential range in NH
as a kid couldn't believe it
when we got above the tree line
took the breath from me
one of the most vivid memories
tattooed on the brain
immortalized with a simple pen
write on...

every turn or bend

can't help but want to do
something else that might
make a difference
might not
and of course won't know
without action
looking to the sky
knowing inspiration
comes from somewhere
some of the thoughts
are so clear others get
frozen caught in between
what they meant to be
and what they are
and what they become
as they leak out the pen
or sounds surround
the head like a cloud
can't help but want
to reach more eyes
more minds filled
with random terminal
thoughts meaning here
to the very end
and here at every turn
or bend can't help but
appreciate it all
everything I can absorb
in this short time here...

Xmas day

somehow
warmer than I
remember
sun most of the day
christmas day
family all around
got to spend time
with them all
somehow
closer now than ever
or as far back
as I can remember
in all these
forty years
since my life began...

laughter changed the day

something about
a laugh
that can change
the whole attitude
of the day
wish I knew more
but I don't make wishes
anymore and 

no one thinks it's less
but it's a lot less
actually replacing it
and maybe that doesn't
make sense if anyone
is keeping track
most likely
not just staring
at the xmas tree
wondering if it's true
and if you have ever
read his words
those thoughts
he has when
no one is laughing
no one is watching
his hands slide
across the page
like a determined wanderer
in the desert at night
colder in the direct
moon light
once all the clouds
move on
the wind replicates
that laughter
and it probably
made his day again...

13 months old

only thirteen months
into the lifetime ahead
can't even imagine the thoughts
and trying to understand
the year through the eyes
of a person in their first year
of life on this earth
my niece Ana
on a plane soon
before even understanding
most of what she will be a part
to see the rest of her family
far from home let roots be known
sights to be seen
might actually stick in the memory
also captured by pictures
as a back up documenting the life
unrolling before little feet
thirteen months into it
barely begun and still unsure
which language first word will
come from maybe like her
it will be a combination...

cold night ninety-two

can feel the cold
even before I put
myself back into it
it's what I do when winter comes
and I don't want to sit inside
brave the cold numb fingers
without gloves thoughts
stuck on the crazy world events
only technology tells me it's real
I don't actually see any of the insanity
going on in the world from where I sit
am I wrong I do feel the cold
sitting on a pillow on the floor of my room
before I step outside for a little smoke
a little mix up hoping to put some of it
to rest soon we shall see small steps
to big gains everything counts
and most of it matters
even before I get out into the cold...

once here exactly as would be imagined
spot will warm as I sit and absorb
the end of a second day of rest prepared for
holidaze as no rest until it is upon us
like the cold on this December night
so many before it but none like this one
upon me at this moment lucky to be feeling
the cold while drinking hot coffee
most everyone winding down for the night
getting ready to sleep this mind doesn't soon
stop to rest funny how I do not dream
or remember them while awake and
if I can't remember them you're
gonna have a tough time convincing me
I do can you see my breath in this
cold as I do thicker with some smoke
a little mix up medley black swan
above silently soaring looking down
to white knuckles gripping the pen
nearly tearing the page but won't tear up
over the age of the hobby or pastime or
passion gift curse infection addiction
to documenting everything
gotta keep things straight in case
they shut off my memory
still don't think I could forget
the feel of cold nose and fingertips
as I explain myself to no one
and anyone who listens or catches
a word or two lost and at the same time found
myself writing out back in the cold
where it all began...

those high above

shadows paint pictures
that change as soon as the light
is changed or moved
or covered with clouds
made by me and those
high above shadows
imprint thoughts on the mind
and elsewhere while
holding the pen
in the backyard
at a fire pit that still
smells like last night's blaze...

small enough

small enough I would
crawl between the rocks
like the smoke
when a fire lit
a cave system created
to encircle the fire
wonder if I can continue
through the coldest months
to come days still shorter
less than a week longer
again small enough
to notice the sizes
and lights above us
and how they appear and
disappear out of view
small enough
to appreciate the magnitude
of life at each moment
than all at once
the sunlight bursts
through a thick cloud
right into my eyes again
with force no wonder
it's been worshiped
ever since always
and then some...

gather what I can

at times I sit in awe
staring t everything
around me where I sit
the wind blows all around
me as I sit as if
some higher understanding
is upon me what if the wind
really does have something to say
to those patient and willing to listen
gather what I can from the thoughts
swirling in the wind
signals of my own
blown back with smoke...

beyond any & all control

what's really happening
some say the earth is warming
some say it's going to be another
cold winter but who really
knows for now
will just pause to enjoy 55 degrees
in December ten more days
then everyone takes a day off
what's really happening
as some days the wind blows
and clouds move quickly overhead
other days only streaks
doubled white lines in the sky
some days it clears just as quick
and others the gray it creates
can last for days
what's really happening
beyond any & all of our control
how can we make things better
none of created the maze
we walk through in our daily life
none of us can pretend to know
any and everything there is to know
some of us collect the thoughts
and things that come to the mind
as the sun moves across the sky low...

looking North

the clouds finally
start to break up
well into darkness
maybe tomorrow
sunshine will follow
and outside will invite
not impede the flow
so many thoughts
colliding as the night
moves onward
sitting as still as possible
over-stand what's above
impossible at this point
to know now
knew then see the same stars
twinkling too still don't know
what you are haven't gone far
many days become redundant
but productive and positive
when someone else needs a lift
rise up for breakfast with dad
enjoying my time here
more as time passes
just relaxing as the clouds
break up and it looks a little clearer
since only twenty minutes ago
but I haven't moved looking north...

won't have to say it

just have to decide to
not be afraid
and really just turn
off the television
technology has its negatives
but positively it puts
every library at our fingertips
we can always research things
for ourselves and sure it's easier
to watch the news and go to bed
thinking we know what's going
on in the world
just have to decide to be happy
and enjoy every smile
glad she gave her final
smile and laugh of the night to me
her first born
enjoy every high-5
and genuine person
you might know
or see when we grind
to keep all the bills paid
anything to increase the positive
and the real it's got to be real
not just words
so good to see you
make me know it
and you won't have to say it...

hard to complain

the sound of rain
has stopped but the wind
can still be heard
in the nearly skeleton trees
some branches still hold tight
but most of the leaves has fallen
someone has to notice
the sound of the baby crying
is never pleasant
but her laughter later on
more than makes up for it
feeling is much better when
her smile doesn't go away
thoroughly enjoyed two restful days
spent it with family and alone
taking care to keep the balance
walk that fine line
even though I jump off
to solitude as I sleep and regain
footing with each forward step
good to see siblings both happy
in what they have found and created
parents too despite any crab-like set backs
ones to hurdle over like the worst
case scenario thoughts
gone as the count down to the end
of the ordeal is closer with each day
each week happy with each waking day
hard to complain about anything
except maybe the rain...

imagination conversation

it might actually be after seven
but I had to guess
because the pen was already
moving across the page
and I tried to think quick
what time was it the last time I passed
a clock in the kitchen look at my phone
when I last made coffee
I used to let them make it
but now I just reuse their cups
keeping it good and hot awhile
knowing I like to sit outside
pen in hand climbing that pile of thought
with a vision that has to adapt to the night
because objects tend to blend together
the porch railing rungs seem to move when
a quick glance is caught or even the long stare
at the waterfall can change it to the shiniest hair
that's not really there can only imagine
conversations or have them with yourself
and that gets old quick
especially when you are pretty sure
your neighbor caught you talking
with no one in sight out of mind
with time to spare as if I care
to check my first guess
will sometimes stick and I will
catch up at some point if I was wrong...

always hear the train

December begins with rain
and it's cold but
as we say here
at least its not snow
and as I say
you don't have to shovel rain
I will take it and not complain
found a dry spot up out of the rain
putting thoughts down no strain
on the mind and the brain
some might still say insane
and I definitely won't stay in one lane
long enough to be labeled
all the so called truths told
turn out to be fabled
just hoping on more sun
than snow this year
even when it gets too cold to sit
outside and clouds cover the sky
at night filled with rain
in the distance sound is carried
and I always hear the train...