dark early cold quick

it got cold quick
someone asked
how I was liking life
today and I couldn't
help but be enthusiastic
with only 4 more for mom
then into a new clear
can't think of a better
way to put it they want to treat
and we want a cure
they don't want to look

it gets dark early
and cold quick
when December begins
typically a hoodie and a jacket
nights out under the stars
seems like they spin overhead
but we have been taught otherwise
only time will tell
and maybe truth will never
be truly known
I know it got dark early
and cold quick...

Orion

suddenly the white
of the page reflects
the last remaining daylight
scribbling and scratching
the hand and the pen
blend together as one unit
peripheral still helps me climb
and see the stars every night
especially Orion have been noticing
that one since childhood
always made me feel connected
to certain unknown
and suddenly all learning
has become undone
and in that height
an understanding over and above
naming a creative force
we can't understand only
respect the light as it comes
and goes around as the clock
tells us the time when darkness
finally takes over Orion
will be bright overhead
like three pieces of silver
hanging from an infinite
thought each night...

cross legged like a desk

legs crossed like a desk
on the deck sun beyond
the horizon light slowly fades
and the chill begins to set in
almost December almost
another new one
coming right in as if invited
as if we have a choice
and there will be lots said
about choice in the next year
but we can only really chose
to be happy each moment
legs crossed until I have to switch
because one leg becomes numb
under the moving weight of a heavy hand
ugly under sight for sore eyes
might understand the hard work daily
have to make a living somehow
to enjoy living in some way
other than what some boss wants
finally switched the desk leg
and the angle isn't the same
somehow I will figure it out
for now while I still have light
while awake and I still have some
fight in me for today
who can really say
no one sees me cross legged like a desk
in the shoe city at dusk...

tales of captain cook

watch the smoke drift upward
thinking of a smoke catcher
some twenty years ago
hard to believe
time flies forward
progression of course
and they still are a-changin'
the jester would laugh
if he knew how I juggle those
old lyrics in the head for years
still moving forward
got no one to pass it on to so
I put it here forever burned
into an unfadable page...

don't be scared

the world is just crazy
but the only thing
we really need to be afraid of
fear and living afraid
we lose if afraid
and some exist only
if we are afraid
and it's really about control
physical and of the mind
some will still deny
but the control is mostly
out of our hands
we do decide what we do each day
but most of us have to work
usually for someone else
and at most get a couple days
to ourselves to whatever
it is we chose to do
we have to earn money
in order to pay the bills
whether we want to or not
being afraid is not on any to do list
the world is crazy
but we don't have to be afraid
especially about the things
media tends to harp upon
truth is we will no doubt survive
and out live the lies…

the way in the wind

quiet now except
for the wind
except for the smoke
and my hand held
fire in the whole
earth can't think
of doing anything else
at this point
putting pen to page
is surely passion
but more like a responsibility
too for the future
what if every hundred years
or so they reset everything
how would we know
quiet for now except for
the man made waterfall
and the thoughts that race all day
all night awake
and asleep at the wheel
and still finding the way
in the wind
and the sounds of the night
except for my smoke
and my passion burning
like fire through these pages..

clear the air

warmed by the sun
sitting in the yard
again listening
to the birds
does anyone care
two days without
clouds and cool
clears the air...

what's the plan

the world has no doubt gone mad
maybe we can look at what we see
and the information we are given
what's the real plan
behind all the violence
what's another politician
going to do to right the wrongs
stop the wars maybe
end the debt based monetary policy
outlaw the IRS anything useful?
what's the real plan
missions to mars
millions flushed into space
anyone else stop to think
what kind of crazy fuckin'
world is this place where we live
call home and travel around
while repeating all the slogans
remember freedom fries
not quite fifteen years
now the blue white and red
spreads like Americas rainbow tint
profile social experiment
spiders we all get caught
in someone's web
navigate carefully
watching each step
and what it could really mean
if in fact we knew
the real plan...

would I even know

can't let my newish schedule
ruin my thought process
last night's cold finally
did in the last of the garden plants
too much shade listening now
to the sound of leaves falling in the woods
beyond the fenced in yard
can't let the cold keep me indoors
not cold enough to completely
retreat behind three windows
still a basement room
wondering about the thoughts
in six months or ten days
from now attitude adjustment
for sure although I don't
seem to have a problem
finding the right plant for the job
at hand or foot in mouth at times
and no one holds it against me yet
but who am I? and
would I even know?...

lifetime library

it's not a self confidence
thing so much
it's more of an ignorance
to self promotion
hard to explain
what it is
I am trying to say
if anything at all
just might turn out
to be the documentation
of my life in thoughts
snippets of random
journal entries
written to friends
can't seem to keep any close
and family members
who want to share ideas
so it really isn't a confidence
thing I tend to keep my head
down building my library of thought
a lifetime of thought
might get buried as historically
insignificant but I tend
to think otherwise
now that's self confidence...

same room different room

a year ago having
just come home
where I grew up
came back to a place
with a faith base
so to speak
a year ago having not much
faith in higher powers
still felt the faith in my family
helped me make the right decision
to come back home
from where I slept uncomfortable
sleep better than ever now
same room different room
same house comfort level high
a spot I know well
a year ago having been called crazy
from a distance some will now see
that crazy up a little closer
but I am the crazy one
admitting that some of my beliefs
have indeed changed
one year ago having seen things
a little different and mother
being sick was not the catalyst
for this change started before
any of us even knew
glad the decision preceded
the diagnosis...

that moment gone

every fifteen minutes
sounds bring thought
to the moment
forgetting for that moment
whatever came before it
and will after
just a moment to reflect
quick and bright
headlights on wet pavement
out the dining room window
in the rain soaked night
forgetting now
as that moment is gone...

one overhead light

cold rain driven
in doors dark room
one overhead light
watching the clowns debate
a year from any selection
and who really cares I say
everyone of them is going to continue
war on multiple fronts
if not more so none of them will
get my vote cold rain
can be heard on the street
in the wind on the glass
keeping it warmer inside
clock still chimes
every fifteen but seem
to only notice it at night
sometimes in the pre-dawn
bathroom break from sleep
hear it then too
and the clowns continue
to go back and forth...

what's lost

something gets lost
most don't even think
about it
the system is set
and play the part
as much as I do
to get along
and in turn survive
in this world
don't especially want
to spend everyday
selling fruits and veggies
could definitely have it worse
but isn't something better
possible something gets lost
and I drive alone
met my brother for pizza
he wonders if he should
wait for love to return
why wouldn't he if it's
love upon returning
it's love now during
the waiting part can be too long
they say 15 days
waiting on permission
but that's completely different
where was I going
where have I been
with these new eyes
seeing thoughts different
something gets lost when you
don't believe nearly everything
you are taught to be true
how would we know the difference
we instead trust them and
something gets lost
and they say the Russian submarines
are threatening underwater
internet cables
don't we have satellites
somethings got to give...

smoke alarm

before noon
struggle to keep eyes wide
new pens new books
waiting for the new thoughts
tired of waiting getting
ready to simply go find them
the unending thought
collection experiment
most don't bother
just keep on as the day
drags on maybe I am
the smoke alarm...

side tracked

side tracked and distracted
disappointed at times
but still loving life
success is in recovery coming
that smile is back
she will be stronger than ever
side tracked and forced
to slow down
maybe to appreciate
all of life's colors
the ones falling from the trees
two days rest how long do you
wait before you laugh
at the idea that the department
of anything can be depended on
maybe we are all better off
on our own how would I know
side tracked when seeing
that smile from mom
knowing she feels good again...

never slowing down

never consistent
except in the change
in front of each step
of every day
never slowing down
at least 5-6 miles daily
stacking produce
selling the fruit
to the people
doesn't seem too important
but people like their fruit
somehow 24 years pass
too fast buying silver
not fast enough
but always changing
smiling in the face
of any adversity the day gives
never giving up above all
and there is the consistency...